Archive for July 19th, 2008

madness is like gravity;all it needs is a push!!!!

winnie har is the new head prefect.don’t worry,i can’t imagine it at first,daryl.its like a teletubby being promoted to a power ranger.if you guys can’t imagine that then i should suggest watching a few episodes of Barney the Purple Dinosaur to train yourself to “use your imagination”

finally,the movie that i waited for since 2005.it’s worth the three year wait for christopher nolan has outdid himself.The Dark Knight is the best movie of the year.the magnitude of my happiness after i came out of the cinema was way bigger than whenĀ i watched transformers.this is going to be a very long post.the review is in pink,the dialogues in blue,and my life experience is in green (as always).

i was supposed to watch TDK on the day it was released:thursday until i found out yuanwen wants to watch it on saturday.so i delayed till saturday.however,my mum told me to go back to sitiawan on thursday night.fine,i have to cancel my appointment.so i decided to ask someone to watch it with me on saturday night but that person refused,citing scheduling conflict.i was disappointed.then my mum told me she’s comingĀ  to kl.ok then,i thought i was going to sunway on saturday.that is until she ended up too sick to drive herself home at 10am,saturday morning.as a filial son (despite the many arguments),i drove her home thus cancelling my sunway appointment.when i reached sitiawan,i called the person i asked earlier and again my invitation was refused.again i was disappointed.it was so bad that i wanted to shave my head bald (well,not bald actually…no1 or 2 la).guess i have to watch it ALONE!!!

TDK is the sequel to Batman Begins.you know who plays who and what happens in the movie (albeit briefly no thanks to newspapers,blogs and especially wikipedia).all i can say is,screw the Iron Man-s,the Hulk-s,Spidey-s,bullshitet-bending assasins and the dragonfly man-s.THIS IS THE BEST SUPERHERO MOVIE MADE THIS YEAR!!!!!! Iron Man has a cool iron armour.so what???Hulk has immeasurable strength.does it matter???Batman trumps all of them.

ok.lets put the biased judgement aside.it all starts at the ending of the previous movie:commisioner (he was detective during the first movie) gordon shows batman a joker card.that means the next villain is the joker.the movie starts with the joker robbing a bank which stores the mafia’s cash.he gets 5 clowns and each is assigned to kill another clown.the guy who plays alex mahone in prison break plays a psycho bank manager with a shotgun. “you know who you are robbing???you and your friends are dead!!!” *BANG BANG* .sadly the joker came and shoved a smoke grenade into his mouth.he killed the guy who was supposed to kill him and took the loot in a schoolbus which entered a line of schoolbuses with the police rushing into the crime scene.i mean,isn’t that freaking smart?

batman’s suit is too heavy and he needs a lightweight suit so that he could become faster and more agile.his suit was not bad really.it’s amazing what you could do with money.the mafia is then introduced to the joker and he killed the african american mafia boss by means that the movie unfortunately does not show (i heard that there are no CGI effects).it just shows what a creative guy joker is.he even told us how he got the scars.i was shocked.i mean,did that really happen to him.i’m more surprised than when i heard winnie became the head prefect.turns out he had another story about the origins of his scars.hmmmm.so we don’t really know how he got his scars.

harvey dent (who becomes two face) is the new district attorney who busted half of the crime organisation in gotham at one go.cool huh?he is then later targeted by the mafia.in order to bring batman out (he was hired to kill batman),he decided to kill innocent people until batman turns himself in.at a press conference,harvey dent lied to everyone that he’s batman.soon,we found out that he wants to draw the joker out so that he can be arrested.little that we know that the joker purposedly got himself captured so that he could launch another devious plan that killed rachel dawes and disfiguring harvey dent.

he looks worse than in the picture.this one’s a fake.watch the movie and you’ll see what i mean.

the joker escapes and threaten to bomb a hospital if the guy who knows batman’s identity is not dead within an hour.i hated batman earlier in the movie because he destroyed his batmobile.i hated him more when he crashed his lamborghini.those cars are like……aoife told me earlier at church that i should expect a damaged lamborghini.thank god she didn’t tell me the batmobile was going to be destroyed.batman saved the guy who is going to leak his identity to the world but the guy didn’t do so as his live was saved by bruce wayne.

the joker dressed as a nurse was by far the funniest outfit donned by any other villains i could possibly think of.i’m serious.anyway,he corrupted two face and he started to kill those involved in getting rachel killed.batman then used a sonar-inspired device to track down the joker.however,lucius fox resigned after helping batman out for the last time.hmmm,maybe he didn’r resign.i’m not sure.anyway,the joker got the hostages to put on clown masks so that the SWAT team would gun them down whereas the real villains dress up as doctors.i’m just awed by the clown’s brilliance.joker got captured and sent to arkham assylum (i really want to see what christopher nolan’s intepretation of that place) after exchanging interesting dialogues to batman.

two face was about to kill gordon’s son until batman popped out.two face’s coin was flipped a few times and batman tackled him out of a window.he was assumed dead but he’s the villain in the next movie.that’s the confusing part in this movie.the movie ends.go catch it to fill in the blanks

heath ledger’s performance as the joker is amazing.he embodies all of the joker’s traits.he clearly fits the joker who’s lean,smart and pure evil like the one i’d watch on tv.like he said,he’s the agent of chaos.you can’t really compare him to jack nicholson.jack nicholson’s potrayal of the joker was very good.he never did a thing wrong (except looking a bit tubby).however,heath’s joker is groundbreaking.it’s the first time i saw the joker with bad make-up.its sad that he passed away.if the joker appears in a sequel,i find it very hard to imagine another actor living up to heath’s potrayal.so far,only jack gylennhall can play the joker now.

two face in TDK is MUCH BETTER than in batman forever.i’d always thought of two face as a small time criminal but TDK just showed me why i shouldn’t have doubts whether he’s the perfect villain in the next movie (if he’s alive in the second).aaron eckhart did the role justice.

the only downside in this whole movie is maggie gylennhall (i hope i spelled her surname right).she’s erm…how do i put it in a nice way…hmmm..she’s UNEROTIC…ahahaha.yeah.she’s not attractive.katie holmes should have reprised her role or get scarlett johansson to play rachel (i bet christian bale would rather kiss scarlett than maggie…i know i would definitely prefer scarlett..).it’s really unfair to add her into the stable of attractive leading ladies in the batman movies.kim basinger (who’s hot in the 80’s),michelle pfeiffer (who needs lots and lots of botox to look half as good as her catwoman role),nicole kidman (eyes wide shut…ehehehe),uma thurman (her sexiness just overshadows the whole dumb movie) and katie holmes (she’s not that bad) should be respected and given a better addition.

ian goh,you once said batman’s useless because he keeps fighting with a clown.do you know that if that clown got some alien technology (like lex luthor) or an iron suit (like tony stark) or even the hulk’s blood,he could create damage that even superman can’t solve????i guess watching this movie (which paints a small fraction of what the joker can actually achieve) made you eat your words.

i wonder what would happen if i put on bad make-up and dyed my hair green.hmmmm.i would kill melissa the big fat bitch first.that’s my priority mission if i turned into the joker.i’ll use knives and throw them away once i’m finished.bullets won’t work because the THICK LAYER OF FAT will stop the bullet from hitting any vital organs.plus,it’s disgusting watching fats and oils ooze out of the bullet holes.YERH!!!!then i’ll kill jacob.don’t ask me why.i don’t have the faintest of clues.

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